If there is one thing in life that I learned in life it’s this: people will leave you. I know sometimes this is difficult, especially if we have grown attached to these people. At times, we are no longer in control and the past continues to haunt us. But we need to let go of these people. We need to move on.
And here’s why you need to let go of people who leave you.
Because it’s not always your fault.
Sometimes, it’s not about you. It’s about them. People leave us because their lives have to go on. And so are ours. Remember that they are just specks of dust in our universe and it’s not your fault if they get lost out there, or drift somewhere cold and lifeless.
Don’t get caught in the past and try to blame yourself because you lost that person. Remember, you may have given the reason for the departure, but they still made their choice.
Of course, no matter how bonded our relationships will be, we all want different things and there are times that you have to leave your place right now, and leave the people behind you to achieve the things you wanted. Would you want them to stay forever by your side, not fulfill their dreams and spend eternity in regret and resentment?
I think, if you really value someone, you would gladly let them go. One of the purest forms of love anyone can ever give is look at people they value chase for their dreams with joy at your face thinking that it’s probably the best for that person.
And that’s what you need to do as well. You need to accept, let go and move on.
Because it’s already killing you
I tried to sugarcoat it, but it made me seem like a douche.
Most friends may have advised you to “hang in there buddy” but I’ll say what you really need: let go. How long are you going to hurt yourself? How long are you going to live in false hopes?
Let me tell you a secret: your friends are sick of your brooding. They just care about you so much that they don’t tell it upfront. I mean, look at yourself. You might have forgotten to take care of your body. Or maybe, you stopped being productive at work. Maybe you even stopped seeing other people?
Do you really want to live the rest of your life like that?
Because no matter how you deny it, the only one who tries to work it out is you
Maybe you don’t realize this, but the only one left dancing in the waltz is you. You’re just so filled with the idea that both of you are trying but in reality, you’re the only one who’s willing to salvage this relationship. Maybe they have given up and let you go and you’re just trying to fit the wrong pieces to the wrong puzzle.
You may not feel this now, but it’s not something you should be wanting. Have you ever learned from the past? Remember that time when you tried to fit your hand in the small bottle just to get that last piece of cookie? It didn’t fit at first but you tried and tried just to get that final nib. The jar is too tight for you but you kept on trying and the last thing you knew, your hand was stuck in it, and it hurt so bad.
Do you really want to repeat the same mistake again?
Because your life does not revolve on them, and clearly theirs does not revolve on you
It’s simple. While you are wasting your time thinking about them, they are busy… not thinking about you. Maybe while you’re moping around, they are living their lives to the fullest. While you are at your breaking point, they are at their happiest.
Make it a point to make your life revolve around you, not with somebody else’s. Because you can’t compel their lives to revolve around yours.
Because at one point, you just have to honor their decision because life is, albeit harshly, exactly that way
Just accept the fact that you were in relationship with a person. That means you were with someone who is able to make decisions and if that means leaving you, you just have to accept that because that’s how life goes. There will always be people who will enter your life, and there will be some who will leave but that’s not the point of being in a relationship. Being in a relationship means accepting that you will both leave each other at one point in time and you just need to make the most out of what is still left.
For in the end, people leave no matter how hard they promise not too. Somehow, someday, they’ll move on with their lives and you should too because life only move forwards.